Change and I

Never been here before, this place of disgrace
never meant to dance through the door, with a smile on my face
and as I search for the truths, hoping it’s the answers I’ll find
nothing is clear to me yet, the doubts I have make me blind

I am at ease when I am alone
Not comfortable in anyone’s home
No one else around to hurt
as change and I continue to flirt

what is this life I have made for me
it’s not all that you think you see
I’m missing something that I can’t define
It’s not a something you can just find

I trust my experiences, I trust my heart
But, still I’m  intent on ripping it apart
I run from love, I run from the pain
I fly like a dove out of the rain

I am at ease when I am alone
Not comfortable in anyone’s home
No one else around to hurt
as change and I continue to flirt

dissatisfied with the past, tortured by the present
how long will this doubt last, I know I learned my lesson
I’m in a  big hurry for my future to begin
and yet not willing to let my past end

Cares for my own well being, are sitting on the back burners
All I want is to do some living,  ignoring all worry and wonders
I’m not who they think I am, I’m sorry to let them down
this was never what I had planned and now I can’t be found

I am at ease when I am alone
Not  comfortable in anyone’s home
No one else around to hurt
as change and I continue to flirt

with tears on my face and a sprint in my step
I want to leave this place, some distance will help
Look for this person I have been missing so long
I hope I find her before everything goes wrong

I’m trying to change, I’m trying to live
I don’t need the rage,  I accept what I can give
I’m not done searching for me, my heart is still torn in two
I’m coasting on this chance to be, but I still don’t know what to do

I am at ease when I am alone
Not  comfortable in anyone’s home
No one else around to hurt
as change and I continue to flirt

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Emily
    Mar 14, 2011 @ 14:14:30

    This would make an awesome song LoLa!

    Reply

  2. LoLa
    Mar 14, 2011 @ 15:07:31

    Thanks Emily,
    I did actually think of it as a song. But, i have melody running through my head for it….?

    Reply

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Coloring Project – The Frog

Frog

2010 Summer Reading List

Sookie Stackhouse, the complete stories A touch of Dead
Finger Prints & Facelifts
His First Wife, Gracce Octavia
The promise of happiness, Justin Cratwright
Silk & Shadows
Wifey
The Honey Thief
The marriage
Ya ya Sisterhood book # 3
The Other Boleyn Girl
Wishful Drinking, Carrie Fisher
3 book flower series by Nora Roberts
The Kept woman
Twlight book # 4
twlight book #3

Coloring Project – The Swan