Alone But Not Lonely-Maui Diary #5

I don’t think I have ever spent this much time alone in my entire life. I have always been surrounded my friends, family, coworkers, kids or lovers. It has been so quiet and serene these last couple of days. I have literally gone hours without saying a word, which is yet another bizarre phenomenon for me.
I thought I would be bored. I thought I might even get depressed and start to miss my loved ones. But, as it is I am joyful in my alone time. I am at peace here and I don’t worry about anything. It may be a different story altogether if I had work responsibilities to attend too or family issues looming at me. But, as it is I am here to learn to breath. To stop as my boss calls it, “turning green”.

I am the only one sitting in this restaurant by myself. I am surrounded by couples and families. And honestly most of the couples are barely speaking to one another. Most of them are looking at the art or playing on their phones. Watching this lack of interaction reminds me of married life. Reminds me of the countless meals where I was just like all these couples, with my partner, but essentially alone. It’s nice to still have a silent meal and yet not worry that my wondering eye will offend anyone. Or being concerned at all that my texting or face-booking at the table may be upsetting someone else.
I am actually free to do whatever I want to do, when I want to do it, and as long as I am not breaking the law no one is going to stop me. I have nobody else’s feelings to be concerned about. I have nobody else’s wants and desires to contend with. I am not depressed at all I am actually in a state of complete peace and happiness.
I hope this is just the beginning of many days like this. So, as I have done so many times before, I can end my post with….”just another day in my life”, and have a feeling like I do now when I do, a feeling of complete relaxation and peace.

view from my room


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Coloring Project – The Frog


2010 Summer Reading List

Sookie Stackhouse, the complete stories A touch of Dead
Finger Prints & Facelifts
His First Wife, Gracce Octavia
The promise of happiness, Justin Cratwright
Silk & Shadows
The Honey Thief
The marriage
Ya ya Sisterhood book # 3
The Other Boleyn Girl
Wishful Drinking, Carrie Fisher
3 book flower series by Nora Roberts
The Kept woman
Twlight book # 4
twlight book #3

Coloring Project – The Swan