Sex In The City

Life is so funny, when I was younger about 20 something and the show Sex In The City was out and popular, I was a die hard fan  (Don’t tell anyone but I still am).   I used to love to watch the ladies and imagine that was what my life was going to be when I was a 30/40 something year old woman.  I used to wish that i had their wardrobes, their homes and their jobs.  I could never figure out who I felt I was most like.  I always wanted to be married with children so in that sense I felt more like Charlotte.  But, at times in my life I have been a real horn-dog and have wanted more sex than anything else, in those times I felt like  I would be Samantha when I grew up.  However, the person who I could relate to the most was Carrie.  I loved her look, her energy, the fact that she could both take or leave the men in her life. I loved what she wrote and the fact that she was able to make a living at it.   I wanted to grow up to be more independent like she was.

At some point Sex In The City went off the air, my hubby and I let our HBO go and I let go of all those dreams of being one of the Sexy City Ladies.  Life went on and I got the picket fence and the marriage that Charlotte and I so longed for.  i moved on past those dreams and watched the years fade away.  Now I am damn near 40 (Ssssshhhh don’t tell anyone that either) and I have access to the very un-sexy reruns of Sex In The City on TV.  I laugh so hard watching this show now.  I find the woman so shallow at times and so superficial.  I find some of the content around men and relationship so comical because now it feels to me as though I have lived through those issues in my own life and I handled them differently then that of the characters on Sex in the City.   I now feel like I am an equal with these ageless woman, that I could have maybe help guide them in their issues.  I feel like i could write a few of my own comical sitcoms.

I am thankful for my life that I have lived, even if I have never owned a pair of Manola Blahnik shoes (hell I had to look up how to spell the name).  I am even ok with the fact that I can’t even afford a pair of Manola Blahnik shoes,  much less pronounce them.   I have not been so extravagant in life that I don’t know the names of all them men I have been with.  I am not waiting like Charlotte for a man to save me and take care of me.  I am not pushing love away at all costs like Samantha and yet I have NEVER been as practical or as successful as Miranda.   The good thing is I am just fine with all of that.  I am happy that I have had the opportunity to live vicariously through others lives, that are much like the ladies in Sex In The city.  Then I am just fine to go back to my little empty home, my happy and complicated work that doesn’t pay enough.  I am content to live on the west coast even though I adore the East coast.  But mostly, I am thankful I could write  my own comical sitcom and didn’t just stay home living through the lives of  the ladies on the show.

Just Another Day in LoLa-Land


Great Advertising

Today at the local farmers market, I walked up to a corner light and stopped to wait for it to say WALK, just as a young girl who was already standing there screamed to some guy across the street.
“I want to suck your dick”!
I was ill prepared for that statement but managed to ignore it and mind my own business, as I looked across the street to figure out which one of the boys ( yes I mean boys) she was devoting such urges to. When suddenly the same girl says loudly,
“I like your skirt”
I had no idea if she was talking to me because there was a crowd of people around but I turned to look at her because I was in fact wearing a skirt. She and her girlfriend she was groping were looking straight at me.
“Thank you” I say
“Did you get it at forever 21?” She asks
“Umm no” I answer
“You should shop at forever 21” she demands
“Sometimes I do” I replied.
To which she goes off,
” you should totally shop at forever 21 you would love their clothes they would look great on you”
obviously she didn’t listen to me.
” I work at forever 21 and so does my friend.”
As she looks back at her friend, hugs her tighter and then kisses her.
She then goes on, ” you should totally come in and shop there ask for me, my name is Molly. I will hook you up. But I don’t work tomorrow, come in on Monday OK?!”
I just smiled at her and was thankful the WALK sign was finally flashing. Just As I was starting to walk away I turned back to her and said, “I hope you enjoy that BJ”. She gasped and her friend chuckled.
All I keep thinking about is how great it is that Forever 21 puts biblical quotes on the bottom of their bags and then hires people who are heathens like me.
Maybe it’s ironic or maybe just funny. But more like a funny hu?!
Oh well just another moment in LoLa land

Thank you in a sentence

I took the beautiful sea foam sponge you gave me for Christmas, that you used to use when you took your hour long baths with my luxurious bubble bath and I cleaned the molding fruit, dirt and grime off of the back wall that lines my patio with it. Thank you

Love riding bikes

I love going really fast on my bike! I love whipping past parents and their kids, walkers and other riders. I especially love whipping past men in riding gear when I am sporting my flowers pink back pack and hot pink sports bra. It is by no means my sport of choice and yet is uses my strongest muscles, my legs. On a path where one should not ride faster than 15 mph I like to try and get up to 30mph. I like to assume that I am in composition with the cars on the highway next to me. I love it when they get stopped at the light and I don’t. I want to waive as I go flying past them. I want to scream out to them, “hey look at me! I’m gonna get to work before you and NOT spend $4.10 a gallon on gas.” I like to imagine that none of the homeless people I pass, could ever hurt me because they can never catch me. I guess you could say I love to ride my bike!

Great Dates

I was just talking to a friend of mine who is all nervous about a first date she has lined up for tonight. I was telling her I could relate because I had a particular date almost two years ago that had me such a nervous wreck I was sick to my tummy all day. But that when it finally happened it ended up being one of my top three dates ever. She asked me why it ended up being a “best date” and what were the other two best dates. I said, “he showed up! And he showed up sober” then we laughed.
But really her questions made me ponder “what makes a date so much better than the rest? Why were these three dates so special?”
Here’s what I came up with. All three dates took me somewhere I had never been before. All three dates added an experience to my life that I have never had before. All three dates paid for most, If not all of our date. All of them were very attentive and filled with compliments, making me feel all warm and appreciated inside. But the biggest thing I noticed in ALL of them was the Effort value!
In all three dates each man made a huge effort to take me out. I think that is the most important thing for me is seeing effort made for me. I told a man recently that impressing a woman starts from the moment you pick her up.
Do you look nice? Did you clean up the car so it was ready for her? Did you open the door for her? Did you pay for dinner? Did you ask her questions about herself? All of these things show an effort made to make the date more enjoyable.
Maybe it comes from being married for 12 years and having my man make NO effort in anyway shape or form for me. Maybe it’s because I feel as though I am always making all the plans in my life, so I really appreciate it when someone else takes that initiative just for me.
Maybe some day I will tell you all about these three amazing dates, maybe I won’t. But the interesting thing is all three of them have transpired in the last three two to three years of my life. So hopefully there will be more coming.
Hopefully they will become regular occurrences in Lola-land.

I Am Not Dead Yet

Watch the tense by which you speak of me
I am not dead yet
The muted tones of your voice do not make it impossible to hear.
Just more obvious to me that I must listen harder

Look at me with sorrow after I have passed
To feel your pain around the loss of me while my heart still pounds only makes my heart beat quieter
I am not dead yet

Why be afraid to hug me now
I am not dead yet
Physical touch is what I need more than ever before
Your fear of hurting me only brings me loneliness and hurts me.

I am not dead yet
Our memories have not been forgotten
When you take the time to stroll memory lane I wonder what it is you are not saying about the now

Please treat me as you always have
Touch me the way you would have before
Talk to me as your confidant as I’ve always been
Please be the you I love, for I am still me

I am not dead yet

Little Cracks

There are cracks in the cement where there were none before

Little slivers of doubt that have started to invade the foundation of that which we hold dear

One good storm and the water will penetrate its hard form and start to weaken it from the inside out

One good shake and the cracks will only increase in size potentially swallowing all who may rely on its sturdiness.

Cracks seeping to all corners of this landscape we built our love on.

Like a spiderweb trying to encompass all corners of the room. These slight seams in our concrete can only make it harder for us to maneuver.

What will we do?

Coloring Project – The Frog


2010 Summer Reading List

Sookie Stackhouse, the complete stories A touch of Dead
Finger Prints & Facelifts
His First Wife, Gracce Octavia
The promise of happiness, Justin Cratwright
Silk & Shadows
The Honey Thief
The marriage
Ya ya Sisterhood book # 3
The Other Boleyn Girl
Wishful Drinking, Carrie Fisher
3 book flower series by Nora Roberts
The Kept woman
Twlight book # 4
twlight book #3

Coloring Project – The Swan