The Courtship

Lately I have been doing a lot of thinking about “The Courtship” process.  I am a bit jaded these days about it, so you have to excuse the negativity.  I think that “the courtship” process is just False Advertising.   People are so into putting out their best foot on the first dates.  They are willing to only share the good things about themselves and treat you the way they think you may want them to.   It makes sense, I mean really, if a man took me out and told me on the first date that he beat his ex-wife and lost custody of his kid because he was a drunk, I am sure I would write him off right then and there.
But, is it beneficial for anyone to paint a perfect picture of WONDERFUL, when you are not?   Why treat a woman like a princess just to land her?  What are you going to do when you do land her?  Are you prepared to keep treating her that way?  Why look at a woman like she is the prettiest woman in the world and be so mystified that you see NO ONE but her, only to see everyone but her, when she decides she likes you too.  Why go out of your way to express your desire for someone if that desire is just a temporary side effect to the ache in your pants?
We woman fall for that extra special treatment, It’s like someone put us in the middle of a romantic comedy and we are the lead actress.  We see stars and moonbeams, we light up from the attention and the obvious feelings the man has for us.  We think to ourselves, “Oh wow!  Romance isn’t dead after all!”   Then we fall into these hopes, these dreams that this movie could in fact be our lives.  “ahh maybe he is the one.  Maybe he is the one who will always adore me.  Maybe he will be the one to do all those special things I thought would never come true”.  We dive, blinded by our own desires for this perfect life.  We dive into this film that is in fact a spoof on Romantic Comedies or some horror movie in disguise.
If one has no intention of acting in a relationship like one does on a first date, then why act that way at all?  Why paint a fake picture?  If you are not the kind of person who likes to hold your partners hand when you walk with them, then don’t do it during the courtship.  If you are the kind of person who thinks a woman should pay for part of the meal than ask her about that before you go out. Don’t. wait until you get to the restaurant and don’t do it just when you are getting to know the other person.  Let them know your intentions before they get used to a fake you.

There has to be some middle of the road.  There has to be a space between, where you are being yourself without maybe displaying your skeletons all at once and yet at the same time, being more yourself then some super amazing version of you that is only evident during holidays or when you see someone else you think is hot.


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Coloring Project – The Frog


2010 Summer Reading List

Sookie Stackhouse, the complete stories A touch of Dead
Finger Prints & Facelifts
His First Wife, Gracce Octavia
The promise of happiness, Justin Cratwright
Silk & Shadows
The Honey Thief
The marriage
Ya ya Sisterhood book # 3
The Other Boleyn Girl
Wishful Drinking, Carrie Fisher
3 book flower series by Nora Roberts
The Kept woman
Twlight book # 4
twlight book #3

Coloring Project – The Swan